


The Dangers of Repetitive Wrist Movements

by virdant



Series: Tumblr Prompts [1]
Category: Hannibal (TV)
Genre: Canon-Typical Violence, Crack, Gen, Humor, Implied/Referenced Character Death
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-10-23
Updated: 2018-10-23
Packaged: 2019-08-06 09:11:36
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 355
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16385279
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/virdant/pseuds/virdant
Summary: Hannibal gets carpal tunnel.





	The Dangers of Repetitive Wrist Movements

**Author's Note:**

  * For [kinokodon](https://archiveofourown.org/users/kinokodon/gifts).



> From kinokodon's prompt of "Hannibal gets carpal tunnel during world cup cuz vuvuzuelas". As always, I oblige. Originally posted on tumblr [here](https://virdant.tumblr.com/post/176245346891/hannibal-gets-carpal-tunnel-during-world-cup-cuz)

“You only have yourself to blame,” Will snapped as he chopped the potatoes in quick repetitive movements. 

“The potatoes are to be diced,” Hannibal said, from where he was relegated to watch. 

“You can dice your potatoes when you can use your wrists again. Until then, you’re stuck with whatever I feel like doing.”

“The surface-area to volume ratio will impact the speed of cooking, not to mention the texture of the product.”

“And if you haven’t decided to murder an entire stadium of people in the exact same way, you wouldn’t have carpal tunnel and you’d be able to chop your potatoes yourself.”

“Dice,” Hannibal corrected. 

He dumped the chopped potatoes into a bowl and started on the carrots, hacking them into uneven pieces in pique.

“The vegetable cutters are in the drawer to your left.”

“I’m not cutting the carrots into flower shapes.”

“The visual appearance of a meal impacts one’s appetite.”

“And how does the visual appearance of rabbit skulls impact your appetite, Dr. Lecter?”

Hannibal studied Will thoughtfully. “The noise bothered you,” he said, apropos of nothing.

“A lot of things bother me.” He frowned at the rump defrosting on the counter. “Uneven vegetables aren’t one of them.”

“And the noise?”

Will inhaled, sharply. “Have you seen the state of our freezer?”

“It will keep,” Hannibal replied. He turned the brace, a the spandex stretching as he tugged at it. “Even in a conventional freezer, uncooked meats can be stored for four to twelve months. Longer when vacuum sealed. If thawed slowly, the taste and texture is virtually unchanged.”

Will paused in his mutilation of root vegetables to make his way to Hannibal. He pulled the brace over Hannibal’s hand, tightening the velcro straps carefully to prevent any circulation from being cut off. His hand lingered, the tips of their fingers touching.

“I know,” Will said, to the join where Hannibal’s thumb met his palm. “It was grating. It’s better now.”

Hannibal pressed his fingers to Will’s.

“But next time change it up. I’m not cooking vuvuzuela-blowing soccer fans for four months because you got carpal tunnel from too much stabbing.”

**Author's Note:**

> comments and kudos always appreciated!
> 
> enjoyed this? [reblog on tumblr](https://virdant.tumblr.com/post/176245346891/hannibal-gets-carpal-tunnel-during-world-cup-cuz)  
> want to talk writing? [follow me on tumblr](https://virdant.tumblr.com/) | [follow me on twitter](https://twitter.com/virdant)


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